Toon-ing In

Percival Pig cartoon!

2008-08-13T06:27:00.000-07:00

Historians Rejoice:Percival Pig Cartoon Found

2008-08-13T04:40:00.000-07:00

In 1926, Percival Pig was the biggest star since Thelma Talridge, but unlike Talridge, his fame has faded into the mists of time.

I spoke on the phone with animation historian Bud Banks about the discovery of a Percival Pig short called "House Painting".

Me: Hi, Bud.

Bud: Hi.

Me: So, I'm sure you and your staff are excited about finding "House Painting".

Bud: We sure are. This place has been looking dingy as hell- the mailbox out front is peeling and the guy left a flier-

Me: No- I meant the discovery of a Percival Pig cartoon.

Bud: A Pig what?

Me:"House Painting". A short cartoon staring Percival Pig, from 1926.

Bud: Never heard of it.

Me: Oh. Well... there was a cartoon found.

Bud: Yeah, I heard that part. Look, Fred, I got a lot of stuff to-

Me: Frank.

Bud: What?

Me: Frank, actually. My name is Frank.

Bud: Right. Well, anyway, look. Those cartoons got lost for a reason. You ever do Sudoku?

Me: What?

Bud: Soduku- it's like a number crossword puzzle.

Me: No, but I came here to talk about Perciv-

Bud: Addictive as hell.

Me: I want to interview you about the discovery of this new Percival Pig cartoon.

Bud: Look, kid. Those cartoons were godawful. Nobody who worked on them went on to do anything worthwhile anywhere else, so they're an evolutionary dead end.

Me: I like the rubber hose bounciness, and the innocence of-

Bud: Seven.

Me: Seven?

Bud: Several. They made several of those cartoons, and none of them were any good.

Me: I heard "seven". Are you doing Sudoku?

Bud: No, I'm listening. Look, every comedy act has to have one straight man and one patsy. Percival Pig was just a straight man! They made whole cartoons about him doing his laundry for Christ's sake. Nine.

Me: I think an animation historian would have more interest in a major discovery like this.

Bud: Discovery? You want a discovery? Discover how a book can be required reading at at least 4 major animation colleges, yet the stupid pea-brain publisher allows it to go out of print. Discover that. Five.

Me: Well, I think it's important.

Bud: What's important is to have conflict with your characters. If that pig character decides to build a fence, he goes and does it! There's nothing stopping him! It makes for weak story. Now look, you seem like a nice kid, but I really gotta go. I'm sure you like those cartoons, and God bless ya. Have at 'em.

Me: Well, thank you for your time, Bud. This has been-

Bud: Four.

And that's how the Q and A went down! We hope to be able to post this cartoon on this blog soon! I'm sure you are as excited about it as we are!

ProdCo Gears Up To Unleash Its most Outrageous Concept Ever: "School School"

2006-09-05T18:57:00.000-07:00

Hi folks! Animazing here!
I've been the first animation scholar to find out about about a lot of developing shows thanks to the international clout that comes from typing a moderately recognized newsletter, but nothing on Earth has prepared me for the show I saw today.

"School School" is a new show about schools that go to school!

Created by PixelZoneStorm Animation, the show features the patient teacher Dunbar College teaching all the schools at School School how to become great schools. Featuring: Pinky the Beauty School. Junior High Jr., Putter the Driving School, Pierre the Cooking School, Trendy J.High School, Swinger the Golfing School, and last, but not least, the cutest one: L.M. Entry.

Created in Maya, the show features the schools in such classes as "Bell Ringing", "Door Unlocking", "Door Closing", and "Window Closing". The fact that the schools are only able to move by dragging themselves slowly across the ground does not for one instant stop this from being edge-of-your-seat entertainment!

The plots revolve around Trendy J. High School's attempts to be a 'World-Class" school, and woo the beautiful Pinky, while thwarting the condescending Pierre.

This is truly a groundbreaking show that will change the course of television, and I encourage all of you to watch it. I will be able to post more about PixelZoneStorm Animation productions in the future, because they were nice enough to give me a brand new laptop! So not only are their shows top-notch, they are interested in freedom of the press as well!

I'll be sure to keep MY 'pupils' on this 'School'!

Public Expected To Throw Themselves Into A Tizzy Over New 3D Animated Movie Project

2006-08-11T12:15:00.000-07:00

Big things loom on the horizon for PixelHurricane Co. as it readies its debut of a can't miss animated blockbuster.

"Humanz"- is a CGI tour de force that will introduce audiences to a world where human beings rule!

Imagine a place where flesh-colored buildings topped with hairpieces dot the landscape and natural elements like mountains, trees and shrubbery take the shape and form of hands and feet! The story concerns the adventure of Joe Sapiens; a spunky, bright-eyed idealist who travels to the big city of Peopleopolis to find his fortune, only to meet a gang of rag-tag misfits who oppose the Big Boss Man, a villain who has staked his claim on the lovely Polly Trueheart! Can the gang rally together and make things right? Sure they can.

Featuring Robin Williams playing every role in the film, aided by thousands of tiny motion capture sensors, and 'cleaned up' by a team of 'motion-capture enhancers' (recently demoted from the animation department), the studio has bet everything it has on this huge money-making property.

Joe Henck, spokesperson for PixelHurricane Co. popped a champagne bottle open and lit a cigar with a 50 dollar bill while explaining:

"This CG thing is a sure thing! Every one of them makes more money than the last! We'll all be farting through silk when this thing hits!"

The company has spent $138,000 on rented security, to help keep order in the lineups, as the crowds are expected to stretch around city blocks and be camped out for days.

Joe Henck continued: "We have committed partners in the toy, garment and recording industries waiting to roll out the biggest pile of merchandise ever witnessed by human eyes. 5 sequels have started production already! If this thing doesn't make 800 million dollars by next month, I'll eat my hat with Worcestershire sauce!"

Sounds like a winner, Joe! I'll be first in line with my Kiddy Meal and T-shirt!

2d Resurgence Whets Producer's Appetites

2006-07-07T06:35:00.000-07:00

Hi gang! Animazing here! Here's an annotated fairy tale for you:

Once apon a time the Magic Prince
(i.e.: Michael Einsner)
left the Magic Castle
(i.e. The Disney Company)
and the New Magic Prince came into the Same Magic Castle
(i.e.: Joe Lasseter came to work for Disney),
and the New Magic Prince declared that the Old Magic Prince had banished the Court Jester to the dungeon, although the people clamored for him, and this was wrong so it's time to free the Jester.
(Lasseter saw that Einsner had stopped making hand drawn cartoon films, even though people like them, and this was wrong so it's time to free the cartoon films.)
And the people rejoiced.
(people went to the movies).

And they lived happily ever after.

It's a great story, but how will it play out in real life?

I asked several studios what they think of the coming resurgence in hand-drawn feature animation.

First up, PixelStrike Animation head Joe Frankenbaum:

"Man we've been waiting for something like this. We have 2 scripts that have been collecting dust since the "Lion King" boom. One- "The Princess and the Poo". It's like "The Princess and the Pea", but with a contemporary spin. The princess meets a little alien called "The Poo", who speaks by farting! Good songs by Hamilton Baumbach- he did some Off-Broadway that was nicely reviewed. Hasn't done much since we recorded the songs back in '98, but we still own them, so they're good to go. Lots of sidekicks. I think we can get Dane Cook to play a stork, and there's a humming bird that's right for someone with a lot of energy- I'd like to say Dave Chappelle, but nobody has signed anything yet. "The Poo" is played by a four dollar fart machine.

Second, is "Sherlock!" a wacky musical take on the great public domain hero. Baumbach did some songs for that. We're looking at Ashlee Simpson as the love interest, and Tim Curry as Moriarty. Lots of sidekicks. We want Joe Rogan as Sherlock's magnifying glass, and Jim Gaffigan would kill as Sherlock's pipe- he could whisper asides to Sherlock, like "Is that really a good clue?!?"

I laugh when my wife goes "Enough with the sidekicks! Even the sidekicks have sidekicks!"- but you gotta have 'em.

We're just going to sit low and wait for the first few hand drawn features to come back, then we'll roll out the big guns and come out blazing!"

Next up: Kim Delazny from ToonMotion Pictures:

"I'm so glad the hand-drawns are coming back. I've been dying to get this one made:

"The Cowboy Princess". It's a musical about a russian princess who hides out in the old west and pretends to be a boy.
It's got everything: great musical numbers, funny sidekicks, and a climax that takes place on train tracks inside an abandoned mine.
There can't be any of that 'gun fighting' and 'whiskey drinking', and the Natives are college educated or pretty much non-existent in our version of the old west, but the musical numbers are to die for.
We have Bill Engvall and Ron White as horses.
And because it's animation, we had to get some magic in there, so we have Andrea Martin as the Water Witch of the Western Wood. She's 'spook'-tacular!
Girls like princesses, and boys like cowboys, so a princess acting like a cowboy will enchant both demographics!"

What can I say?
It looks like hand-drawn animation will pick up right where it left off!
Spook-tacular, indeed!

Focusing On Minutia Allows Crew To Forget Their Show Is A Piece Of Crap

2006-06-11T19:53:00.000-07:00

"Tails For All Ages" may be a depressing waste of time and talent, but don't tell that to the crew responsible- they're too busy wondering how anthropomorphic mice might set their tables for lunch!

Director Borge Gunnarson shows me some drawings. "See how the pictures on the wall are actually postage stamps? It's that kind of attention to detail that will reward repeat viewings." A worried look crosses his brow, but he quickly shakes his head and smiles brightly. "It does for me, anyway."

Word around the Digistorm Entertainment Studio has it that while the show itself limps along with trite scripts, flat vocal work, and incompetent timing, director Gunnarson, along with his crew, spends most of his time and energy devising plans for mice to have bottlecaps for washbasins, kitchen sponges for doormats, and bicycles made from eyeglasses.

Producer Candace Boorman is excited.

"Gunnarson is adding a second layer of energy to an already exciting property. He's here hours before I get in, and stays many hours after I've gone home. Just this morning he showed me a drawing of Morty the Mouse using an old orange juicer as an umbrella. The rain runs down the curved section of the juicer, then runs out the spout on the back. It's the cutest thing I've ever seen. We HAVE to get the writer to write in his script that it rains in this episode, so we can use it!"

Joe Brant, the location designer, is surprised that he's busier than usual.

"Usually, I just design a location, it's approved, and that's that. But Borge gets all these ideas after the fact, so the designs keep coming back, you know- 'add in a toothbrush for a scrub brush, add in a coin as a serving tray.' You get kind of sick of seeing the same drawings come back again and again with all these revisions, but if it makes the show better, then I say 'why not'!"

Why not indeed! It's detail like this that makes television animation the sparkling wonderland that it so often can be!

Animator Dies, Glad To Have Put In That Unpaid Overtime

2006-05-29T11:40:00.000-07:00

Burbank

Animator Glen Q. McConnaghie, most notable for being responsible for the classic "peeling' sequence in "Monkeys In Banana Land", passed away at his drawing table Saturday. He was 73 years old.

Helen Woodchank, producer at WowToonz! spoke with us about McConnaghie's life and career.

"The last time I spoke with Glen, a few months ago, he expressed how happy he was to have been able to help out WowToonz! by putting in so many hours of unpaid overtime. His last wish was that I explain to the next generation that the only way to become as skilled as Glen is to animate as much as possible, for as many hours as possible. And to ease up on the coffee breaks."

McConnaghie is survived by his wife and adult children, who were informed about his passing this morning.

"It took us a while to find them." Ms. Woodchank continues. "They naturally assumed he was at the studio, cranking out another masterwork. Many times Glen would express his amazement at how quickly his children were growing up, getting jobs, careers and spouses, while he just sat at his desk working...working. Despite the fact that he felt his job was always teetering on the abyss, he was a real trouper."

"Glen did that sequence in "Freckle-face Francis and the Pea-Shooting Princess" where the Princess first hits Francis with a pea, and he falls on his butt. That was so funny! Glen missed his son's graduation for that one. But many times he told me that other animators should follow his example. He knew that we were just a small company finding our way, and that his loyalty would be rewarded some day. He was right. As soon as WowToonz! was acquired by GloboDynaTech Entertainment, he was one of the animators we didn't fire!"

"His last words to me were so sweet. He said, 'Helen- tell the other animators that it's worth it. We need to put in long hours so children can have the chance to watch fine animation like "Freckle-face Francis and the Flatulent Android", available on DVD this September, from WowToonz!"

New Show Based On Children's Book Just Like Old Shows Based On Children's Books

2006-04-04T20:05:00.000-07:00

BlamZone Animation has announced another 26 episode animated show based on Fred Crimpen's somewhat popular children's book "Rabbits Ahoy!"

After a number of shows produced by Blamzone in the mid nineties failed to catch on with audiences, the company, on the verge of bankruptcy, decided to entertain original pitches.
Blamzone producer Sheryl Tooker elaborates: "There was a scary period where we were bombarded by crazy creatives offering up shows like a child who gets his wishes granted by fairy godparents, and a talking kitchen sponge that lives in a pineapple, of all things! We at BlamZone were relieved when the CEO finally decided to stop experimenting, and retreat into the warm safety of adapting another children's book."

"Rabbits Ahoy" has been a brisk seller amongst gift-giving grandparents, school librarians, and is a regular selection in the "Pediatrician and Dentist Periodical Purchasing Society" catalogue. The series will feature characters who appeared in other Crimpen adaptations. Said Tooker: "With a children's book, we can put it on a table in the boardroom and look at it, and understand it, without having to make a 'leap of faith' with some artsy lunatic."

Ms. Tooker continues: "The past 5 attempts at adapting a children's book ended in failure for our company, and for our shareholders, but the one we did before that made a boatload of money, so there's no reason to think that doing more of the same won't pay off in a big way. If the show is a hit, we can expect to make at least $2,000.00 per episode, with merchandising making up the shortfall. Everyone will want one of our stuffed rabbits. Right now we are in the process of negotiating a deal with "Joe Panklin's Midway Shows" to have the bunnies featured at Ring Tosses and Rubber Duck Fishing games at County Fairs across the midwest."

"Rabbits Ahoy" is the third Crimpen book adapted by BlamZone, after "Puppies Ahoy!" and "Ducks Ahoy!" Rumors have it that Crimpen has negotiated a deal that allows his company and the network to take 95% of any profit. Said Sheryl Tooker: "Mr. Crimpen has been a treasure to work with, even though he demands that every picture of his characters in the show always be his 3/4 front model, making inbetweens impossible- but the impossible is what makes our animators thrive!"

Miss Tooker looks thoughtful. "It turns out that the sponge show we passed on was, yes, Spongebob Squarepants, and yes, it has been very lucrative, but you have to look at the big picture realistically. Risks are "risky" for a reason, and in the long run, it's better to have 5% of a sure thing than 100% of something that may or may not pay off. Right?"

"D" Lister Becomes an "A" for Animation

2006-03-11T05:51:00.000-08:00

Raz G., former rap singer turned actor, has signed a 3 series deal with WorldShow Entertainment to bring his experience making poorly selling rap recordings and straight-to-video cop movies to the animated small screen.

Shannon Tula, producer at WSE had this to say:
"We feel that Raz G. has the urban feel that will help WSE connect with today's hip youth. Sure, we have people here who have worked for us for years, who understand the animation process, and have the ability to make shows that would use their budget wisely for maximum impact. But at the end of the day...I always liked that song 'Get Ya Booty Out'"

"Man, it sure is nice to come around here and be treated the way I'm supposed to, you know what I'm saying?" said Mr. G. "After I was dumped by the record label, and ended up playin' 'thug number 2' in 'Cop Heat part 5' or some other piece of crap where I run around waving a gun, I felt pretty low. Outside- I'm just another out of work actor. I come in here, and I got 50 people tryin' to make all my ideas come to life."

What are those ideas? Raz G. continued.

"Show #1: me in school. Kids will get to see where I came up, you know what I'm saying? There will be like, me... and my friend, and like we got like 2 girlfriends each, you know what I'm saying? Plus a couple of goofy looking white dudes. For comedy. I'm gonna call it "Raz-Matazz" or "Raz-zle Dazzle" or some kinda s--t. You know what I'm saying?

Show #2: me in space, or something. Gonna be fighting monsters, saving bitches, you know?

Show #3: S--t, I don't know. Cop?

Director John Sorrencia looks enthusiastic.
"I told my daughter that daddy would be directing Raz G.'s new show. She said the cutest thing. She said, "Daddy, is he as famous as Spongebob?" Ha ha. Well, I had to admit that I didn't know. I'd never heard of him, but he's probably really famous. I'm sure to have 'street-cred' with the 'homies' after this show is wrapped, eh?"

Beginning his adventure in animation, Raz G. looks thoughtful.

" I didn't never watch no cartoons coming up on the streets, you know what I'm saying? But I learned some stuff. Deals come up- and if you're smart, you take 'em."

FOCUS! FOCUS!

2006-03-06T18:11:00.000-08:00

Hi all! My little neighbor Shawn attended a focus group recently, concerning an upcoming show called "OCD ROBOT", about an obsessive compulsive robot who lives in a crazy robot factory! Shawn knows about this blog, so he smuggled out one of the questionnaires! Now you, my faithful readers, will get an insider's view about how a show as groundbreaking as "OCD ROBOT" gets on the air!

Here it is, and Shawn, I owe you a big box of firecrackers for this one!

OCD ROBOT QUESTIONNAIRE

1. Do you like this show?

(__) YES
(__) no

2. Really?

(__) YES
(__) no

3. On a scale of 1 to 5, how would you rate OCD Robot?

1. Super
2. Great
3. The Best
4. Outstanding
5. Fantastic

4. Do you like "edgy" characters, with "attitude"?
(__)Yes
(__)Usually

5. Do sunglasses on a character make that character edgy?
(__) Yes
(__) Certainly

6. Which one of the following characters would you be most interested in seeing added to the show?

(__) An evil robot who looks like one of the good robots
(__) Darth Vader (please note that we cannot use Darth Vader in this show)
(__) An evil robot who looks like one of the good robots
(__) An evil hologram who thinks kids like you are stupid, and hangs out with an evil robot who looks like one of the good robots

7. Do you like the idea of OCD ROBOT being made in a video game if we were to give you a free copy?

(__) YES
(__) AFFIRMATIVE

8. Would you recommend to your parents that they buy you OCD ROBOT toothpaste, chewable vitamins, clothing, toys, posters, magazines, and snack crackers, using a loud shrill voice, and causing a scene until such items were purchased to appease you?

(__) YES
(__) I don’t understand the question, but sure.

9. In future epiodes, which OCD traits would you like the robot to have?

(__) Collects scraps of metal from robot factory floor, places them in a lineup in order of size.
(__) Flicks light switch off and on 10 times before entering a robot factory.
(__) Polishes outer metal shell in clockwise rotations, counting to 100.

10. After watching OCD ROBOT, do you have a comprehension of Obsessive Compulsive disorder, enough to, say, get a television production company a nice tax break for providing ‘education’?

(__) YES

11. Which new story ideas for future episodes of OCD ROBOT interest you the most?

(__) The characters stay at the robot factory and talk to each other.
(__) The characters work out low-key social issues, in the robot facory.
(__) The characters express how much they prefer not knowing details about their past.
(__) The characters converse about how they enjoy things never changing, and how interesting it is to stay in a robot factory, never venturing outside.
(__) Other (checking this box counts as a non-answer)

12. If we were to give you a thousand dollars, would you say that OCD ROBOT is the best show ever?

(__) YES
(__) no, but I’ll change my mind later

The Cartoon Mashups That The 70's Forgot

2006-03-02T21:39:00.000-08:00

WHEW! Coming up with an animated summertime blockbuster is hard work! That's the reason for no postings for a month. But there is one thing I had to talk about-

EBAY!

When I'm not pounding the keyboard plotting out my amazing film, I'm scouring Ebay for dubs of the "Cartoon Mashups That The 70's Forgot."

I was too little to have seen them in person at the time, but there's something so cool that speaks to me, when I look at these things now.

I get the impression that the studios had so many good ideas that it was hard to winnow concepts down! There were team-ups of characters from various shows, and combinations of genres that were mind boggling!

For instance, one of my favorite 70's mashups was "Go-Go Goose and The Kount"- the plot was amazingly simple:
Go-Go Goose, a hippie cartoon goose in the year 2525, unlocks a vault that contains the coffin of Count Dracula! They join a rock band and solve mysteries together. Think that was "groovy"? Season Two introduced "Dracula Jr. and the Henchlings" to the cast, along with "FishFace and Fin", a "Fonzie"-type shark and his 'yes-man' sidekick. The combination of wacky slapstick and bone-chilling horror is something the networks would never air nowadays, the cowards.

Or how about "The Fattest Gun The West"- where Wild Bill Hickock uncovers a genie who zaps him into the 70's, where he teams up with Race Rammer, a race car driver? The spell the genie put on Wild Bill that made him balloon up to 800 pounds whenever he got angry was hilarious- but not so hilarious when Race Rammer was trying to speed away from savage tiger-men in a race car! They join a rock band and solve mysteries together.

One of the best though, was "Sprightly BeLightly and the Disco Choppers". Three live action 'kangaroos' (actually actors in costumes) would look into their 'Story-Scope' machine...and then the scene would turn animated as we shift to the story of Sprightly BeLightly- a kind magical imp from the faerie dimension, who works as a Private Investigator with the Disco Choppers; three roller-boogie girls who know Kung-Fu! They join a Disco band and solve mysteries together. The fact that this was set underwater on Mars in the future was just icing on the cake!
Sure, there were a lot of scenes with the gang climbing in and out of airlocks, but it was Sprightly's sidekick, Leprechaun John, who brought the magic home. The way he would mistakenly trip the bad guys while jealously hoarding his pot of gold from the Disco Choppers was just priceless!
Whenever Sprightly would hiccup, it forced whoever heard her do it to tell the truth.
The Disco Choppers secret identities were as rollerskating waitresses at a "Dive-In" restaurant. How many times did I see those feisty Choppers stand up to the ribbing of local motorcycle tough "Nasty Malasty" by pouring a chocolate seaweed malted over his head? It never gets old!!!

The best part was at the end, when they would recap the day's adventure with a disco music video-and this was years before MTV!

The 70's must have been a time of limitless imagination.

New Kid's Show Based On Clive Barker's "Hellraiser"

2006-01-27T13:23:00.000-08:00

Burbank

"Heckraiser: The New Breed", a new cartoon show for preschoolers based on the movie series by Clive Barker debuts this week.

Jane Weimarant, producer for JumpStop Animation says the new kid's show will follow the adventures of "SafetyPinHead" and the "Junior Cenobites" as they thwart their Nanny (only seen from the knees down), and try to find the puzzle-box that will send them back to Heck.

"It's time for us to help Mr. Barker freshen the brand, and introduce everyone's favorite multidimensional S&M monsters to a whole new generation."

In the premier episode, SafetyPinHead feels jealous because he thinks Butterball Cenobite ate the last piece of Lemon Meringue pie. Butterball swears he didn't, but SafetyPinHead is so sure Butterball is fibbing that he concocts a trap that springs rusty hooks into Butterball's stomach and flays his intestines open, exposing the pie, which SafetyPinHead greedily gobbles up. They both wind up with tummy-aches, but for completely different reasons!

"That episode underlines the lessons inside every show" Ms. Weimarant continued. "It shows the effects of jealousy, and fibbing, and how we must all tolerate one another, whether we're grown-ups, children, or shrieking demons being skinned alive for eternity in a flaming pit of despair. Plus the colors are really nice."

"Some people balk at animation's long tradition of making kid's shows from source material that's inappropriate, from "Robocop" to "The Toxic Avenger" but we think that once kids see the warm interaction between Chattering Cenobite Jr. and Skinless Frankie, all fear will melt away. We also plan a cameo from Candyman coming up, and as we know- all kids love candy!"

The Best Thing About Animation- The Groupies

2006-01-19T11:43:00.000-08:00

Boy- I'm so excited about starting work on my new animated feature. I can picture the Academy Award and the crowds of girls!

I found out over dinner that Mary-Anne, the Executive Producer, can't pay me any money now, so I probably shouldn't have told everybody at the Moving Experience (where I used to work) to go flying right straight to hell. But Mary-Anne has promised me that after the movie shows its profits, I can get a cut of the action! Using simple math, I can see how I will be a millionaire by the time I'm thirty!

Then Mom can live in MY basement!

I pitched my story to Mary-Anne at a fancy restaurant where she picked up the tab (naturally). I lost some momentum when the Keg staff interrupted to sing a public-domain version of "Happy Birthday" to an old man, but got the energy back quickly.

I don't know how many times I've heard my friends say "This Dungeons and Dragons game is so entertaining, somebody should just write one adventure down and make a story of it."

My story is the story of Glomphalgh the Elf, and his quest for the Seven Scrolls of Sc'alberdawn. Along the way he meets a thief, a magician, and a big monster-man, and faces the Army Of The Necronidarc.

Mary-Anne says there should be a princess and songs, and get rid of the thief. I can kind of see her point, but we must stay true to the story! I just have to keep asking myself- What Would Walt Do? He'd concentrate on the plot! So I have to remember to tell Mary-Anne that Plot Is King, and princesses can wait.

Although girls like princesses, and would probably be grateful if I put one in my story.

- BRAINSTORM!

What if the PRINCESS was the THIEF!!!!!

I have to go call Mary-Anne!

Prod Co Announces New Innovation: Straight-To-Video Sequels With No Original Film

2006-01-12T06:08:00.000-08:00

Taking innovation and theoretical logic to its conclusion, DigiPixelStorm Entertainment today announced that they will be producing sequels to animated films that never existed.

"Fireball 2" concerns the daughter of Jace Random, the heroic extreme spaceboard athlete from "Fireball" (never produced), as she struggles to maintain her dignity and live up to her father's reputation, as a human in a sport dominated by aliens.

Wilma Galt, producer at DigiPixelStorm, could barely contain her enthusiasm.

"There are certain things audiences expect with sequels, the sort of things DigiPixelStorm can deliver.

For instance- we don't have to spend time carefully introducing characters and their motivations- we can do it through dialogue, and the audience assumes all the heavy lifting has been done in the original. Like when Jacella sees Mazztron, she says:
"Mazztron! I haven't seen you since you worked as a spaceboard mechanic for my father, who has mysteriously disappeared, so I have taken over his spaceboard franchise, only I have no mechanic, and I can't concentrate because I think that one of the other contestants I'm up against is actually a bad guy who is involved in the kidnapping of my father! Do you still comically bungle tools, making you seem like an oaf, even though you're the best mechanic in the galaxy?"

All done without the character budging an inch.

Magic.

And sequels always have a smaller budget. A movie like 'Fireball', could be expected to have a budget of 100 million dollars, whereas we can make the sequel for much much much much less. Way less. Audiences know that the animation is never as good, and in our case, it isn't.

Sequels always have non A-list celebrity voices. We have to have celebrity voices, of course, but why choose Morgan Freeman when Michael Winslow from those 'Police Academy' movies will do? Plus he makes those funny 'beeping sounds', which saves on our post budget."

Wilma Galt continues:

"The number 2 or 3 after a movie title has a built-in trust. It says 'hey there, Mr. or Mrs. consumer. I don't have big pretensions, but the folks seemed to like the first version just fine- fine enough to make a li'l sequel like me. Give me a chance, with expectations lowered as far as they can go.'

So far in the pipeline:
"Robot 2" (not to be confused with Blue Sky's 'Robots')
"The Incredible Superheroes 2" (not to be confused with Pixar's 'The Incredibles')
and 'Racoon and Turtle Go To Town 2" (not to be confused with Dreamwork's 'Over The Hedge')

We plan to give Pixar, Dreamworks and the rest a run for their money. We have recruited some of their top talent.
Our head of story comes from Pixar, where he ran a sandwich stand, and our TD comes from Dreamworks, where he used to fix Steven Speilberg's laptop.

But it's the merchandising opportunities that really get me excited.

I'm told that every one of the characters in "Fireball 2" has their own 'walk cycle'. I haven't seen one, but I'm thinking that the characters walk on some sort of treadmill, and the wheels of the cycle turn.
That's exciting.
I can't wait until we can start manufacturing these motorcycle toys to every kid in the world.
There are also bed linens in the works, with photos of beautiful supermodels on them, posed out like our characters. They're calling them 'Model sheets'. I see they have 'dope sheets' as well, to appeal to the 'hip hop' crowd. Brilliant."

That's what I say, Ms. Galt! I can't wait to see these fantastic sequels! And someday, you may have enough clout to do the original!

Chudleigh Animation Group Announces Polly Doodle: Back For Fun!

2006-01-10T14:15:00.000-08:00

Chudleigh Animation Group, still smarting from the cancellation of their show "Sisters-In-Arms" have announced that they are reviving old-time 20's &30's cartoon Polly Doodle for a New Series: "Polly Doodle: Back For Fun!"

Polly Doodle is best known as Waverly Cartoon's answer to Betty Boop, starring in such rousers as:
"Bathtub Grin"
"Grits Ain't Potatoes"
"Shriek-Easy"
"St. Valentine's Day Mess-Acre" and
"Fling Fling With The Floy Floy",
before the wartime zeal for Technicolor, plot, and characterization made her cartoons seem stale and pointless.

"The idea just came to me out of nowhere" said Janet Wilkinson, Chudleigh Animation producer. "We feel that if we replace the Jazz music with diva ballads, the 'reefer' references with 'pop culture' references, and the leering sexuality with shopping at the mall, there's no reason Polly Doodle can't be just as popular now on TV as she once was at the Moving Picture Parlors."

As of publication, there was no word if the new Polly incarnation will be joined on screen by her old cartoon co-stars: Naptime Nappy and Jigaboo Jones.

New CG Feature Aims To Give You the Heebie-Jeebies

2006-01-08T08:33:00.000-08:00

Imagine a showdown in the Wild West-except not with a good cowboy and a bad cowboy, but with a good cowboy and a ZOMBIE HILLBILLY!

That's the concept behind Roger Melnick's new production of the first CG Horror/Western: "Uncanny Valley".

"I kept hearing motion capture referred to as 'animated corpses', around the studio, and my first thought was- we need better motion capture. That was expensive, so I came up with the Zombie Hillbilly thing." Melnick says between sips of his Latte at a local coffee hangout.

"I got a bunch of dinner-theater actors into a warehouse, covered them with ping-pong ball suits, and voila!" adds Melnick. "The thing is, because it's all done on the computer, you don't need much in the way of preproduction.

Like none whatsoever.

We had a rough idea of where we wanted people to stand. That we knew. And get them to rock back and forth. THAT'S the key to good motion capture: get your actors to shift their weight constantly, no matter what, so they're always moving. Movement is what animation is all about"

I asked him about the story.

"Well, the cool thing is, westerns practically write themselves. If this was live action, maybe audiences would think they've seen it all before, but do it in animation, and you're looking at a whole new movie. We've also added a comedic element, in that all the zombies have intestinal problems, so when things flag a little, I'm able to zing the audience with a good fart gag."

I asked him about the promotional art for the movie.

"Yeah, that's, uh... hand drawn. Because we...want the look of the actual movie to be a surprise. And the gore? Well, it IS a family film, sure, but we wanted to get the "Fangoria" crowd as well, so there's a little something for everybody. The zombie chick in leather is a shout-out to Russ Meyer. Kids may not get the reference, but they'll instinctively know she's hip."

"As for the voices, we got this guy who's amazing. He does impressions of Gilbert Gottfried, Robin Williams, John Goodman, and Eddie Murphy, so this thing is gonna be like no animated movie you've ever heard before."

"My favorite part is at the end there's a huge dance party! Audiences love that crap!"

"When audiences see what can be done with off-the-shelf software, top quality voice impersonations, and motioncapped actors, I think they will be quite surprised."

That's right folks! When people think motion capture, they'll think: "Uncanny Valley"!

Sisters-In-Arms: the Postmortem

2006-01-05T15:39:00.000-08:00

Chudleigh Animation Group, Burbank:

There are many stories of cartoon shows that got cancelled before they could shine their light on the world, such as:

"The 2-Headed Bumpkin"
"Where's the Snimp?"
and "Ant Patrol: The Picnic Chronicles"

so when I was given a chance to interview the participants in the recently cancelled toon "Sisters-In-Arms", I leaped right in!

One of the first people I met was Justin Blakeny, the design supervisor. Sporting a goatee, baseball cap, and trendy black glasses, he looked nothing like someone who would be in the animation biz- totally stylin'!

"Speaking strictly off the record, dude, Sarah Halbermann was a total nightmare." Said Blakeny. "She knew nothing about animation and didn't care to learn. We tried to tell her that those designs of hers may work ok in a comic strip, but for animation, they were a non-starter. I tried to get Wilkinson (Janet Wilkinson, exec. producer-A.) to talk to her."

He takes a sip of Coke.

"Overruled."

Story supervisor Jake Ray chimed in. "Or how about the way they had these boring-ass meetings where everybody stood around in a circle arguing about whether the door on the cafe should open IN or OUT? Oh my God! The show itself sucks goat titties, and they're wasting valuable time that could be spent getting a good story together worrying about set dressing."
Jake adjusted his ballcap and stroked his goatee before adding thoughtfully:
"What I just said is not for print, right, bro?"

Next I made my way to Joan McBride, a layout artist on the show.

"Look, I'm a woman- I'm all for women getting ahead and all that, but I think that Sarah Halbermann overriding everything that the art team had to say by dismissing them as male chauvanists was just dumb. Our goal was to make a show for the audience, for God's sake. Nobody sitting at home cares about our petty office politics"

Nobody but us, right, folks?

McBride continued:
"One of the guys would make a valid suggestion, and Halbermann would automatically veto it, and expect me to agree with her, because I have estrogen. Like- how about more than one camera angle in the show? You don't need a goatee to see how that would be a good idea. This is just between us, of course."

Jeff Matheson, BG supervisor, had this to add:

"Halbermann comes to me and asks me to make a table in Maya for the characters to sit at.
Make a table she says.
What kind of table? I ask.
No idea, but I'll know it when I see it, she says.
So we make about 30 tables. None pass.
We make 30 more. None pass.
Now, all this time, I'm getting NO feedback about what kind of table she wants. No designs, no verbal. Nothing.
After me and my team wasted about 2 weeks, she finally decided on the second one we did on day ONE.
This is strictly between you and me, but I think the folks upstairs were just looking for ANY show featuring female characters, to hit some sort of demographic or something. Makes me nervous that they'll try to resurrect some Godawful piece of trash like like that Betty Boop knockoff from the 30's, Polly Doodle, just 'cause it's a female."

Wow! Who would have guessed that when I volunteered for this temporary gig packing up the offices of the Chudleigh Animation Group that I'd end up with an exclusive scoop for the "Toon-ing In Website"? I'll let Joan McBride have the last word:

"At the end of the day, it's a paying job, even if you can see that it's going to be a disaster. I never challenged Sarah Halbermann, because I need the work. I have a daughter, and, it's a small industry. I don't want to rock the- why are you asking so many questions? You're not the moving guy with the blog are you? Oh Jesus..."

Yes indeed, folks- perhaps with a letter writing campaign we can bring the lost gem "Sisters-In-Arms" back to the airwaves, where it can shine!

Holiday Cheer From Animazing!

2006-01-02T17:59:00.000-08:00

Season's Greetings, everyone!

I had an awesome holiday-- catching up with all my good friends over the Christmas/New Year break.

I had to spend a lot of time upstairs with my parents, but- Good News- they got a HDTV for Christmas, so I was able to watch "The Elf Who Thought Christmas Was For Suckers" - the picture was so clear, you could practically see the fingerprints on the Japanese puppets!

Then, unfortunately, I was taken to visit my sickly Aunt Maggie in the hospital. I felt really sad. Luckily there was a TV in her room, and I was able to catch "The Christmas That Almost Went AWOL".

We had to go for a hayride, but I was able to bring along an early Christmas present for myself-a portable DVD player, and watch "The Bug-Eyed Fleabag's Christmas Carol". God bless us; every one!

There was a big party at my younger brother's apartment, with drinking and girls. I was invited to come along, and I did!
There was a cute girl there, and I almost got her phone number. Next time, I'll ask.
I had a hunch going in that I was going to get lucky, and boy, did I ever! The new computer-animated "SantaBot 4000: X-mas X-Treme" was on. The people at the party didn't mind that I turned the TV on, in fact, it was a hit! (they laughed in the wrong places though. Cretins.)
I might not have a cute girl's phone number, but I'll never forget how the realization of the True Meaning Of Christmas brought UltiKillBot37 to his knees.

So, all in all, I watched over 30 hours of Christmas cartoons this year.

If that isn't "RANKIN" high on a list of toons, you can kiss my "BASS"!

Just kidding, folks! All the best for 2006!!!

Producer Brings Cartoon Know-How To Winery

2006-01-01T05:08:00.000-08:00

-Hollywood

Producer Marcia Crandall, best known in the animation industry as producer of straight-to-video classics such as "Naptime Commandos" "The Kuddle-Lumps" and "The Penguin and Me", for now-defunct "Great Vids" video, has moved out of tinseltown and is now working her magic on northern Calfornia wines.

"The wine business is a lot like animation in many ways." Says Crandall. "These are groups of people dedicated to their craft, with skill and passion, serving an audience who appreciates what they do. It's my job to make sure they don't get too 'wacky' with the wine stuff, and to bring fresh ideas to the table, just like I did when "Great Vids" did the "Andy Capp" adaptation."

Fans may recall "Great Vids" "Andy Capp", notable for featuring the beloved English barfly and womanizer as a stuffed teddy bear who can cause dreams to come true. The series prompted howls of protest from the millions of Andy Capp fans around the world.

Said Crandall "I've made changes around the winery that already have people talking. Jalapeno merlot. Beer wine. Peppermint Coffee Gamay Noir. See, these wine people have been stuck in a rut- it's up to me to give people new choices, you know, to make the wine better."

"Personally, I don't drink at all, but the wine business seemed fun. I don't like Jalapeno wine, but I'm sure someone else out there will!"

"Sisters In Arms" Cancelled Halfway Through First Episode

2005-12-20T23:25:00.000-08:00

The "Women's Lifestyle Channel" has cancelled Chudleigh Animation Group's new series "Sisters In Arms" during the airing of the first episode, sources say.

Line producer Janet Wilkinson spoke to the press today, looking very tired.

"We made 5 episodes and we still have 8 in the pipeline!" she said, to a small gathering of reporters. "We feel the remaining shows, completed in a more limited style, will be saleable to any network who wants to make an offer. Chudleigh Animation Group is committed to making great shows- I'd also like to announce mass layoffs in the art department."

"Women's Lifestyle Channel" representatives stated that the solitary camera angle and the similar droning vocal patterns of the two main characters made them rethink the decision to air the show, after the switchboards lit up with angry and puzzled callers. Reps say that the first 7 minutes of the show where the characters fought about why men can't fold pants properly also contributed to its poor showing.

"Sisters In Arms" gets the greenlight!

2005-12-20T06:28:00.000-08:00

I haven't read much of Sarah Halbermann's syndicated comic strip "Sisters In Arms", but now I won't have to, because it's coming to TV!

Janet Wilkinson, of the Chudleigh Animation Group has adapted this wry, sassy comic strip for the small screen, with Ms. Halbermann herself actinig as exec produer!

Said Wilkinson: "Many people see 'Sisters In Arms' as an obscure newspaper comic that amounts to two women talking to each other in a coffee shop (or any other environment that involves sitting in chairs) with the usual feminist-lite ‘Cathy’-esque humor, usually culminating in a final panel where one of the characters will give one of those reactionary “ain’t life a pip?” raised eyebrow looks to the reader, but I see it as much much more than that.

I see it as a recognizeable property.

What better style to bring to animation? The characters themselves may seem like nothing more than voiceboxes for the strip’s creator in order to complain about things like overbearing mothers and shopping or an attempt to make insightful commentaries about things which usually don’t end up being terribly insightful. But we see the central characters as a 'tabula rasa' a blank slate that the viewer can project herself into. Totally subtle. And we will have character traits created specifically for the show."

Ms. Halbermann herself is overseeing the animators, and really keeping them on their toes! After years of drawing dimensional-looking characters, sometimes it's hard for them to 'take a step back' and try a newer, more modern style. There have been plenty of temper flare-ups- but it'll all be worth it when "Sisters In Arms" debuts on the "Women's Lifestyle Channel" tonight."

Thanks, Janet! I can't wait to link "Arms" with these "Sisters"!

PWHCDSTNLFANNWUAWWRBDSE- Part 3!

2005-12-19T19:06:00.000-08:00

"Get me Adrian Fossbite."

These words, uttered by Producer Ken Leavings, caused a chain reaction that would take "The New Claw" from the flat pages of the funny books to the heights of animated television entertainment as we know it today.

As I interview this unshaven, straggle-haired man in his paper strewn office and coffee-stained hawaiian shirt, it's hard to reconcile the world-weary businesslike man before me with the entertainment powerhouse who knocked hits out of the park like:

"Invisible Crime-Solving Bugs"
"Radioactive Hillbilly Bears"
"Totally In School"
"The Night Force Defenders"
"The Hijinx Pups"
"Twins Times Two"
"Dracula X-Treme 3000"
"The Cutest Unicorn In Daffodasia"

Yes, this titan of television was prepared to work his magic on a superhero with lobster hands!

ME: So tell me, Adrian, what makes you so amazing?

ADRIAN: Are you putting me on?

ME: No- I just-

ADRIAN: Because if you're putting me on, you can hit the bricks right now.

ME: No, Mr. Fossbite, I run the website about animation-

ADRIAN: That one Leavings was blabbing about- right. Right.

ME: How did you get into animation?

ADRIAN: I dabbled in playwriting- then I did a couple of episodes of "Kingston and Kompany"- sketch show. I had a knack for taking what was topical in the day and getting material out of it. Did a killer bit on the "Swine Flu" epidemic, mixed with Carter's Iran Hostage Crisis. Even today, I can't stress enough to the young writers how important it is to liven up your material with topical references- the latest catchphrases, movie parodies, song lyrics. It makes your stuff CURRENT.
So anyway- one of the writers on "Kingston and Kompany" was moonlighting for "Truckboy" -cartoon about a kid who turns into a truck. He got me a gig on that show, and I found out that that type of writing comes real easy for me.

ME: What makes a good animation writer?

ADRIAN: Well 3 things. First, a good imagination. In live action you can have two characters stand there in a hallway and talk and talk and talk. In animation, that's boring. Dull. Animation can do anything, right? No restrictions on imagination. What I like to do, see, is have two characters stand on the MOON and talk and talk and talk.

ME: Wow.

ADRIAN: Second, you have to create interesting characters- give them souls- the audience could care less about a cardboard cutout on the screen, but give the character a soul, and you're golden. For instance- not many people know this. I was the one who made Grandmaw Bear always eat corn on that Hillbilly show-whatsit,there...

ME: "Radioactive Hillbilly Bears"

ADRIAN: Right. Anybody else would just make her an old lady. But I made her into an old lady who eats a lot of corn, and talks about corn.

ME: I remember that! "Dadgum my coo-o-o-o-o-orn!" (laughing)

ADRIAN: (laughing) Right. Originally I wanted her to be drinking corn squeezings-

ME: What's that?

ADRIAN: Corn squeezings, like moonshine- booze.

ME: right.

ADRIAN: But the BS&P wouldn't allow it, so I put on the old thinking cap, and changed it to corn, and the rest, as they say, is history.

(Note BS&P is industry jargon for Broadcast Standards and Practices-Animazing)

You always gotta give characters 'character'- like on "Twins Times Two" I always had Amy saying that line :"Super-Dee-Duper!", you know, that way you could tell the twins apart. Plus the numbers on their shirts.

And the third thing you gotta have is originality. You take something like, a plot from an old "Saved By The Bell" episode, and you TWEAK it, y'know? Make it something new, once you stick new characters in there. I've said it once, I've said it a thousand times, you gotta be original. For instance, old time radio is a goldmine. Nobody ever listens to that stuff, and it's chock full of plots. Jack Benny, the Shadow- pretty soon, it all turns up as episodes of "The Hijinx Pups". Plot is king.
If jokes get in the way of plot, dump 'em. If characters get in the way of plot, dump 'em. Audiences would rather know what the pieces of the puzzle are than hear a dumb joke or watch some cockamamie cartoon characters act as if they were alive. Your characters are there to set the puzzle pieces of the plot in motion.

ME: Anything else in the pipeline?

ADRIAN: I'm pitching a show I've come up with- should be a real winner. It's this kid see, in school, and he sneaks away from school to do secret hero stuff, and nobody's the wiser. It's something that's never been done before, and I think it'll give "White Kids Go To School" a run for it's money!

ME: Thank you Mr. Fossbite. After talking with you, I feel like I know more about cartoons than ever!

ADRIAN: Now I gotta go figure out how a guy with lobster mitts can scratch his ass.

As I made my way out of Adrian's building, past the used CD store with reggae music thumping and the Vietnamese grocery with ducks swinging by their necks in the window, I looked around wondering if the people on this corner knew- that as they led their normal lives, a scant few yards away, was the man who made television history, using characters like "Colonel Panic" "Maw Dawg" "Blipsy-Poo The Unicorn" and "Dippy The Cross-Eyed Dingbat".

PWHCDSTNLFANNWUAWWRBDSE- Part 2!

2005-12-16T06:53:00.000-08:00

see Part 1 below!

Here is a cover for "The New Claw"- the comic that got this amazing project on the fast track to television history!

Ken Leavings, Producer for this entertaining show, explains "The New Claw":

"Basically, there was this comic in the 40's during World War 2, about this superhero with lobster powers, called "The Claw". It didn't really catch on.

Fast forward a bunch of years, and the Fantastic Comics Group, the company holding the rights to this thing, well, their lawyers tell them that if they don't do something with this Claw property, then it's gonna lapse into the public domain. So they throw a team together and whip up "The New Claw".

It's really good. He's got these big hands, and can crush stuff, I guess. I haven't had a chance to...anyway, that book, the New Claw- that's what I grabbed that time when I went into that store with all the comic books."

What a "Super" story, Ken! :)

Part 3 Coming Soon!

Producer Who Hates Cartoons Develops Show That Nobody Likes For A Network Nobody Watches Using Animators Who Would Rather Be Doing Something Else

2005-12-14T21:04:00.000-08:00

Producer Ken Leavings looked skyward and said one phrase.

"Thank God for Telefilm Canada."

The lanky, self assured Leavings, public face of the animated property branch of "The L. and J. Hutter Corporation", was eager this brisk winter day to talk about success, animation, money, and success.

"So I'm walking by this store that sells comic books-some toys, but mostly comics, if you can believe that, so I grab one at random. That comic turned out to be "The New Claw"

What Ken Leavings held in his hands would soon occupy the attention of as much as 35 percent of the The L. and J. Hutter Corporation's 956 employees for periods of weeks, in some cases; months.

"Everyone was real excited about this. Turns out this comic is a big hit. Sometimes it sells 400 copies- so of course I'm thinking series! I always think series. Just not, you know, animated series."

After much negotiation, it was decided that an animated series would keep the contractors in the pacific rim too busy to outsource work to The L. and J. Hutter Corporation's chief rival, Toon Time, who had been circling the prod co for some time, eager to get their expert animation ability on "Love Pups".

"Yeah, old man Hutter really put the screws to me" said Leavings. "Of course I love animation. There's nothing like, you know, that Woodpecker, who laughs. That guy's funny. You can't do that sort of stuff in a big budget prime time live action show. With sexy guest stars."

With his eyes on the prize, Ken Leavings stalked forth to create an animated epic.

"I had just 2 questions for the creatives on this task:
One: Are you passionate about The New Claw? and
Two: Have you been an Ontario resident for 12 calendar months?"

---To Be Continued!

The French Make ART As Well?!?

2005-12-14T19:45:00.000-08:00

A still from the new French Canadian film "La Batterie De La Vie".

I'm still reeling from seeing the new short film by Jean-Claude Phillippe DuPuis, "La Batterie De La Vie", a deceptively simple paen to mankind's ability to love and yet not love, see, and yet be totally blind, discard used batteries, yet never let them escape from the junk drawer of our souls (you'd have to see the film to understand).

Clocking in at a brisk 43 minutes, the film, done with crayon rubbings on used butcher paper, with a score by Montreal's "Mendiants Sales", a found-instrument troupe, concerns the adventures of a used battery, as it is discarded by one man, picked up by a woman, tossed in a trash bin to lay there for what seems like an eternity, found by an alley cat, only to transform itself into some sort of a magical thing and float slowly (oh so slowly) into the sky.

This film is one to be looked at, thought about, argued over, dismissed outright, rethought, then treasured for the ages with unblinking fealty.

It's hard to believe that a filmmaker this accomplished was just last year on the gallery scene, creating installations from broken hamster cages and piles of sand.

It is a testament to DuPuis' skill as a filmmaker that he is able, in under an hour, to make a sly parody of film itself that, to an untrained observer, would seem like the hack work of a boring drunk scratching away artlessly at some freehand drivel without a thought to tempo or audience endurance, while an "orchestra" of homeless crackheads smash glass and belch into plastic buckets in a weary attempt to replicate some kind of urban "Stomp" asthetic.

But it's not.

I get it.

I really do, and think it's sick. (Sick means good now!)

I actually actually liked it, and said as much to Miko, the 23 year old blonde daughter of the distributor of "La Batterie De La Vie", who is perhaps the film's most ardent supporter.

Hi Miko!

Quick-Thinking Producer Avoids Union

2005-12-14T17:42:00.000-08:00

Burbank-

Producer Elizabeth Sheldrake today avoided the animation producer's biggest headache- unionization- by using her quick wits.
Speaking from the safety of her plant-lined office, Sheldrake, 34, had advice for her fellow producers while describing her run in with left-leaning communistas.

"I was standing in the hallway with a coffee and a muffin talking to one of my assistants, like I do every morning for about 3 hours, when I heard some of those people mention the word "union"- my mind began to spin!"

Sheldrake describes how she crept unnoticed into the room.

"They were on a lunch break or something- I don't know. Anyhow- they were all focused on this one fat guy at the front facing them- he was talking about offshoring, skimming budgets, unpaid overtime, you know, like they were BAD things. I knew I had to think fast."

Sheldrake lowered her voice as best as she could, to simulate a young man, and shouted the sentence that made the ink-slingers and computer jockeys forget their cartoon revolution.

"Anime is better than Disney style!" she yelled, then slunk back to the safety of her office.

"The resulting squabble about which style of ridiculous cartooning was 'better' got their minds TOTALLY off unionizing." Ms. Sheldrake said. "Next time the nerd brigade gets riled about who's running this outfit, I have another little distraction- I'll yell out that "The Simpsons" jumped the shark in season 5."

White Kids Go To School

2005-12-14T15:36:00.000-08:00

I saw an advance screening of this today, and I have just one word to descibe it: Big Hit!

It's unlike anything I've seen before- a fantastically funny (yet touching) show, featuring 18 of the coolest pre-teens I've ever seen on a syndicated animation block!

The brightly-colored romp concerns the adventures of Mandy, Zeke, Joe, Kim, Sha'niquaa, Jose, Paul, Flip, Booger, his dog Avery (the name no doubt a nod to the old-time cartoon maker Ted "Tex" Avery) Frederick, Joanne, Cindy, Falina, Suzanne, Kim 2, Julia and Brett, plus their various friends (and adversaries), as they balance tasks such as talking while walking in the hallway, with talking while sitting behind desks.

In the screener episode I saw, Paul and Mandy overheard Joe, Falina and Julia say something about Frederick, Suzanne, Flip, Sha'niquaa and Kim, but they only heard PART of the statement, and a bunch of stuff happened, and everyone learned a little lesson about the evils of gossiping. Were those tears in this reviewer's eyes as Falina and Joe accepted Mandy and Paul's apology? Methinks there was a mote of dust in my eye...

On an ironic note, this show, while featuring a cast of mostly white kids, with a couple of minorities as backups, was entirely animated by Asians!

I've been told that future episodes will feature such adventures as:
-the 18 kids go to an amusement park and talk,
-the 18 kids go to a bicycle race and converse,
-the 18 kids go to the school cafeteria, where much talking ensues.

This is without a doubt one of the boldest and brightest animated sitcoms I've witnessed in many a moon.

Today's kids have more homework now than at any other time in recorded history, so after slogging through a day at school, talking to their friends at school, then coming home to do 2 or 3 hours of homework, what kid WOULDN'T want to blow off steam by watching "White Kids Go To School"?

Children's Book Loved By Millions To Be Made Into TV Cartoon Passively Stared At By Thousands!

2005-12-14T14:05:00.000-08:00

I have it on good authority that the classic children's book: "Puppies, Puppies, Puppies!" has been developed by Fantastimation Animation into a 56 episode series debuting next season, tentatively tiltled: "Puppy, Puppy and a Kitten"! Joseph Lieberkind, CEO of Fantastimation had this to say:

"We feel that the puppy-centric aspects of the property fail to address the needs of the pro-kitten demo that makes up a high percentage of the viewing public. This is a great show, we're very excited about this show."

The book follows the adventures of three lost puppies who find their mommy at the end. When we wondered what other adventures will be in store for the four-legged scamps in the TV show. Mr. Lieberkind said:

"In all 56 episodes, the puppies (and kitten) will get lost, and by the time the episode is over, will find their mothers. This is the rythym set up in the first book, and we want to remain faithful to that vision. That's the type of thing that will keep the audience coming back again and again. That, and about a ton of dream sequences. This is a great show, we're very excited about this show."

As a fan of Fantastimations past triumphs; "Why Did The Chicken Cross The Road?-The Series", and "The Littlest Midget's Christmas Special-The Series", I can boldly say:

So are we, Mr. Lieberkind, so are we!

It's A Great Day For Toon-Tastic News!

2005-12-14T13:52:00.000-08:00

Here it is! The first news blog ever about the crazy business we call animation! We here at "Toon"-ing In hope you love the cartoons as much as we do, and we'll all have barrels of fun!